Roxy - part one

"Deliberate" and "Intentional" seem to be big buzzwords today. I like the principles behind them and I want to live my life purposefully. But some of the best things in life are surprises or accidents that happen with little or no planning.

In 2002 we had a busy home filled with four children and a bird inherited from Grandma. One day my sister asked me if we were interested in getting a dog. I told her that I had my hands full and there was no room at the inn. Her friend Francie called me anyway.

Francie explained that her daughter had a sweet little dog who needed lots of attention. They were all away from home much of the day and the poor little dog spent hours in her kennel. I told Francie we weren't interested, but she persisted. She explained that she was calling me because we were an LDS homeschooling family. She wasn't going to give the dog to just anyone. They wanted a family who spent lots of time at home so the dog would get plenty of attention. Her daughter insisted that the family be LDS because Roxy "loved family scripture study." That was the silliest thing I'd ever heard and I thanked Francie for thinking of us, but told her we really weren't interested.

Then Francie asked if we would be willing to meet the dog, just so we could see what she was like. Francie was so earnest that I finally agreed. They showed up at our house the next day. Of course the kids were excited to have a visit from this little white pup. She ran circles around them and showed us her tricks. She could even jump up into your arms from the ground.

After everyone was thoroughly smitten, Francie asked if we wanted to keep the dog for a few days. Her daughter Lauren began to cry and told us how much she wanted Roxy to have a good home. Then Francie took us out to her car. We couldn't believe what we saw . . .

Captured

I've spent the past week going through our family videos. We have quite a collection of tapes from our camcorder, but most of them are not labelled. So every tape is a surprise--and an opportunity to learn something.

Many of the tapes show me covering my face or asking my husband to turn off the camera. Fortunately, he persevered and captured me on tape many times despite my protests. I complained that I didn't have my makeup on or my hair wasn't done, but you know what? I loved seeing the woman I was 10, 15 or even 20 years ago. I didn't see a single video where I looked so bad that I regretted John filming me. Sure I laughed at some of my clothes and haircuts. Yes, I cringed at how chubby I looked in certain years. But I am so grateful to have some of our memories preserved for the future. I was (and still am) an imperfect wife and mother. But I was there to kiss my babies and celebrate birthdays with little children who are now grown up. I am grateful for the many hours we spent together and that a few of them were recorded by their loving father.

I am grateful for a husband who tells me I am beautiful without makeup and keeps taking videos even if I complain. Here's a picture of the two of us at the beach today. If you look carefully, you'll notice that my hair isn't done and I'm not wearing any makeup. But I hope that what really shines through is the happiness and peace I feel when we're together.

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I believe in CS Lewis, good writing, story telling and sisters

One of my favorite quotes from CS Lewis  reads:

“For in Calormen, story-telling (whether the stories are true or made up) is a thing you're taught, just as English boys and girls are taught essay-writing. The difference is that people want to hear the stories, whereas I never heard of anyone who wanted to read the essays.”

The pictures I posted yesterday reminded me of an essay, but not the boring kind that CS Lewis wrote about.  Instead, I present to you an essay story written by Marianne earlier this year.  I think you'll enjoy reading it--even if you're not her mother.

I Believe in Little Sisters

The summer I turned 16, I received quite a shock. I remember the evening my life changed forever. My mom called me and my two brothers downstairs for a family meeting. My stomach sickened at the thought, because I knew that one of only two things could have happened.  Either my great grandma had died, or my mom was pregnant.  I was hoping with all my heart that my dear sweet great grandma, who was in her 90’s had made the journey to heaven.  But in a few short months, I would learn an important lesson:  I believe in little sisters.

I believe in little sisters because they make you happy. Brigham Young University professor Laura Padilla-Walker stated the results of a recent study which showed that “having a sister protected adolescents from feeling lonely, unloved, guilty, self-conscious and fearful.”[i] Lavender Jane is my two year old little sister. She makes me laugh at least 24 times a day.  She opens my eyes to the simple things in life. She helps me see the joy that comes from roaring like a dinosaur, or singing opera in your loudest voice. She gets way too excited about eating breakfast, and is still smiling as she is carried up to bed. She makes every day fun and she knows how to giggle her heart out.  She makes me happy in every way.

I believe in little sisters because they provide you opportunities to teach. I get to teach my sister so many things, every single day. I can teach her right from wrong, I can teach her new words, and I can even teach her how to eat a whole In N Out hamburger. Little sisters love to learn! At the same time, as I am teaching my sister to learn about the world, I am also getting good practice teaching. One day I will have my own children, so I like to think of Lavender as my trial run for my future family.

I believe in little sisters because you learn patience. Life might look perfect with a little sister, but let’s be honest; it’s not. It is wonderful in every way you could imagine, but it can be hard sometimes. That brings me to my last point: I get to practice being patient with my little sister. Today Lavender dumped dog food all over the floor, screamed in my face at me, tried to chew my computer cord, and almost hit me in the face with a tin bucket she decided to fling in the air. Whew! I have only been home from school for a few hours, and already I have been given many opportunities to be patient and loving with my sister.  Let’s just say I get a lot of practice time.

In all my years, I never wanted a sister. I never once wished that I had a little sister. You may not have a little sister, or a little brother, or any other siblings, and that is okay. You might not even like kids! One nugget of gold I have found through this whole experience is that God likes to surprise us. If you have not noticed already, He will throw some crazy surprises into our lives.  My little sister was that kind of a surprise for me.  Maybe it’s not a new sister that surprises you. Maybe it’s a new friend you make, a talent you discover, an awareness about something, or even something that may seem to be a trial or a burden. Whatever it is, it is important to remember that with everything in life, God’s timing is perfect. It may seem like the worst time to us, but God knows more than we do. When my sister was born, I had to embrace God’s timing. It wasn’t always easy, but it all worked out. Embrace it, let it in, and let that surprise of yours bring you joy.

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[i] Padilla-Walker, Laura. "Sisters give siblings better mental health, study shows." Brigham Young University News. Brigham Young University, 2 Aug. 2010. Web. 31 Jan. 2014.

Two Happy Kids #3

These girls take the best selfies ever.

Two Happy Kids #2

Fitted sheets + fans = really cool fort

Two Happy Kids

Lavender is happy playing with Daddy's shoes. She knows she's supposed to tie them, but she can't quite figure out how. Keep practicing girl!

Evan is happy that he has his GoPro back! He finally gets to look through the thousands of photos he took in Chicago. It really is a miracle that he got the camera back! Left in the back of a cab. Several days later an employee of the taxi company posts on Reddit. Aaron found the posting online and made contact.

Happy Father's Day

 (or Daddy Day as Lavender calls it.)

Here are a few pictures of my daddy.

Such a handsome guy!

When I was very young, my Dad used to make up stories for me at bedtime.  My favorites were about "Elmer the Eagle."  I don't remember much about Elmer's adventures, but I know they often had a moral about obeying or making good choices. Dad was always trying to teach me and take care of me.

Now my oldest son is a father and today he reminded me of my dad.  He asked his four year old if she wanted to go to the store that Sunday afternoon.  It might have looked like he was teasing her, but he was really trying to teach her. My dad often did that sort of thing. On the way home from church he'd ask if we wanted to stop and get an ice cream cone or go to the drive-in movie. My brother sometimes answered "yes," but I knew it was a trick question to see if we would remember to keep the Sabbath day holy.

My Dad has always had a good sense of humor and liked to tease. At the store they'd ask for his phone number when he paid with a check (yes, we actually used to do things that way!)  He would reply that he didn't have a phone. The store clerk would get a little flustered and then my Dad would laugh and give his phone number.  He also liked to have fun at election time.  Once a friend of his was running for a local office and Dad put signs for the opposing candidate in his yard one night.  They both got a good laugh out of that.

When I was a teenager my Dad began having serious problems and pain in his leg.  Finally, he was diagnosed  with cancer.  He and my mother were very concerned and Dad talked to me about the possibility of dying from cancer.  I was not very understanding and I got really upset with him. I got out a copy of his patriarchal blessing and read part of it to him that promised him health and a long life.  I wasn't very gentle or compassionate, but I was full of faith that my dad would be healed. Dad received priesthood blessings and many friends and family members prayed for him.  Later, he went in for another biopsy and the doctors could find no evidence of cancer.  They said that the initial diagnosis must have been in error. We knew the truth:  Dad was healed by the power of God.

I am grateful for my Dad and all that he has taught me throughout my life. I love you Dad!

My Saturday

9:00 AM - Taught Pornography Prevention class
10:30 - Baby shower
12:00 - To the temple with Sonia
1:00 - John was baptized for her father and she was baptized for her grandmothers.
3:30 - Walk with Jenny. Lavender was happy to "see Gramma" at the cemetery.
6:30 - Frisbee at the beach with my sweetheart.
8:00 - Sunset, ahh!
8:45 - Dinner at the Prado

A Few of My Favorite Things . . .

. . . Now even better!

I love granola, but I haven't been able to find a gluten-free, sugar free version I like.  I decided to quit searching for the right brand and start looking for the right recipe.  Fortunately I found a good one here! It is very versatile and you can use whatever nuts, seeds and fruit you like.

Yummy GF/SF Granola

2 cups gluten free whole rolled oats

½ cup raw nuts, chopped

¼ cup raw seeds (sunflower or pumpkin seeds are great)

½ cup unsweetened dried fruit, chopped (I like unsweetened coconut)

2-3 tablespoons honey (or use maple syrup)

2 tbsp coconut oil, melted

½ tsp vanilla extract or almond extract

1 large pinch fine sea salt

Recipe: Preheat the oven to 300º F. Combine all ingredients in a mixing bowl and use your clean hands to mix well and toss to coat. Spread the mixture in a thin layer on a baking sheet and bake for 12 minutes (may take a little longer), until very lightly toasted.

I also like meatloaf, but I rarely make it.  It takes so long to cook and I hate having to check it in the middle to make sure it's done.  Here is the recipe I use, plus a fun, easy way to cook it.  It's another recipe you mix with your hands.

My Favorite Meatloaf

1 1/2 pounds ground turkey

3 slices bread torn into small pieces (or 3/4 cup gf oats)

1 egg

1 cup milk (or almond milk)

1 onion chopped

1 T worcestershire sauce

1 t salt

1/2 t dry mustard

1/4 t pepper

1/4 t sage

1/4 t garlic powder

Combine all ingredients in a large bowl and use your hands to mix well.

(Here comes the cool part! Are you ready?)

Use an ice cream scoop to scoop large balls of the meatloaf mixture onto a foil-lined jelly roll pan. (That's a cookie sheet with sides.)  Bake at 375 for 25 min.  Serve with ketchup.  After dinner, clean your pan by throwing away the foil.  Easy!

Funny Girl

Yesterday we got in the car to go to Costco. I said, "Hop in your car seat, doll."
She said, "I not a doll. Don't call me doll."
"What should I call you? Kitty-cat?" I teased.
"Call me . . . neighbor!" She replied with a laugh. She continued, "Hi there neighbor!" And gave me a friendly wave.

That afternoon, Aaron gave Lavender a ride in one of the big boxes from Costco. He even attached a rope as a handle and pulled her through the house while the box slid around on the tile. Lavender loved it and wanted to play again today. After awhile, she told Aaron that it was his turn. She insisted he get in the box and she tried to pull him with all her might. She was frustrated when he wouldn't budge. Fortunately, she accepted my suggestion to give bunny and monkey a ride instead.

Safe and Sound

Planning a flight with a toddler? Never, I repeat, never bring a carseat on the plane. Unless of course you want to be miserable, annoy/enrage other passengers and incur the wrath of an obsessive flight attendant. That's all I'm going to say about the flight home.

It is great to be home! We got in lots of walking during our site-seeing and museum-going, but nothing beats early morning walks with my sister. The cacti even bloomed to welcome us home.

I also finally received a Mother's Day gift that I requested. My family have me two of Brian Kershisnik's prints for Christmas. "She Will Find What is Lost" has been hanging in my living room ever since and I love looking at it every day. I love the other print too, but "Nativity" wasn't framed, so I mentioned that I would love to have it framed for Mother's Day.  It is beautiful and definitely worth the wait!

I don't think I mentioned this earlier, but when John and Evan headed to the emergency room in Chicago, Evan's GoPro was left in the taxi. Unfortunately, with all the stress of the situation, none of us could remember the name of the cab company. John paid cash, so there was no way to trace it. We tried calling dozens of cab companies, but nothing turned up. Evan was heartbroken. He had documented the entire trip and had thousands of pictures on the memory card that he was crushed to lose. We kept calling even after we got home, but the chances of finding it seemed slim to none.

Then Aaron had the bright idea to look on Reddit. Sure enough, there was a post about a GoPro found in a taxi. We made contact today and the camera is already headed our way. The girl we spoke to said, "My co-workers made fun of me for posting it on Reddit, but ha! It actually worked!" We are so grateful to her and to Aaron!

To top it all off, Evan got the chest tube removed today. It was very painful, but at least he's healing. For now that is. He may be having surgery soon, but that's a story for another day.

Finally

The time has come. We are finally on our way home! We couldn't get a flight until this evening so we made the most of it by sleeping in (even Lavender cooperated!) and hanging out at Millennium Park. We had a great time checking out the bridges, sculptures and fountains. The big electronic faces change expression and squirt water out of their mouths, so that kids love it!

Our biggest surprise was the DNA Testing "Who's Your Daddy?" Truck. For some reason, I haven't seen one of these in our neighborhood.

Evan update: He is uncomfortable, but not in pain as long as he keeps up with his meds. He has an appointment with a thoracic surgeon on Monday afternoon so hopefully he'll have the tube removed then.

We're homeward bound!!

Freedom!

We spent another day at the hospital, but the good news is: it was our last! Evan was hoping to have the chest tube removed today. As a trial, they removed the auction and clamped the tube. After several hours they took another X-ray. Unfortunately, Evan flunked! In other words, his lung collapsed slightly. The surgeon determined that Evan needs to keep the tube in for our flight home. He will follow up with a thoracic surgeon at home and have the tube removed next week.

Evan was a good patient and did his laps around the hallways, totaling at least a mile. He also did his breathing exercises and learned how to care for his incision and drain valve. Exciting stuff, huh?! We also got ahold of the (somewhat) local missionaries, who took a very long bike ride to help John give Evan a blessing. Interestingly, they were the third set of missionaries we met during our trip!

Evan was finally released this evening and he walked (nearly) a mile back to our hotel. I had to include another photo of the amazing view from his room since yesterday's shot was cloudy. The other picture, with the fence in front, is of the hospital.

Although Lavender wasn't quite as angelic today, she did continue her hobby of making friends wherever we go. The hotel staff played a board game with her, brought her fresh pineapple that they cut into little pieces and a huge chocolate covered strawberry! When we left the hotel lounge this evening she gave everyone hugs and kisses! It was unbelievable!

We are grateful Evan is out of the hospital and we are on our way home!

Reasons to be Grateful

We spent today at the hospital with Evan. I didn't think he'd appreciate me posting pictures of him in his hospital gown, so you only get to see a bit of his arm as he is being comforted by Peter (Lavender's doll who is the star of Ezra Jack Keats' book The Snowy Day).

Evan had a spontaneous pneumothorax and had a tube surgically inserted in his chest. It seems to be working well and it looks like the hole in his lung has closed too. Tomorrow they will clamp the tube. If all goes well, they will remove it tomorrow and we will be able to fly home Friday.

One of the doctors told us that it is a good thing this happened before our flight. He said that if Evan had flown, it could have put pressure on the heart that would have been "incompatible with life." Interesting way to put it, but we are grateful for the timing, even if it meant spending a few more days away from home.

The hospital is really beautiful and they didn't even charge extra for this amazing view!

We had some other sad news today. Our dog Roxy passed away early this morning. Aaron got up early to let her out. She was curled up asleep next to the couch, but when he went to pick her up, he realized she was gone. Aaron, Ryan and Marianne buried her. We are sad not to be there to say goodbye, but grateful she died peacefully in her sleep. I don't have a picture of here on my phone, but here are a couple of blog posts with her picture. Scroll down near the bottom of both posts.

http://happyhartz.blogspot.com/2011/02/my-walking-secrets-part-2.html?

http://happyhartz.blogspot.com/2011/10/our-weekend-and-beyond.html?

Finally, I am grateful that Lavender was so good while sitting in a hospital room all day. She even took a nearly two hour nap. I consider it a miracle. Really it was a tender mercy from God. We celebrated by letting her ride up and down the escalator and letting her take a long bath before bed. 

Melanie

Farewell?

Today was our last day in Chicago and John and Evan were both excited to spend it at the Art Institute. We waved good bye to the bean and said hello to the lions in front of the museum. After about 10 minutes of the impressionists, Lavender made it clear that she was not going to sit in her stroller while we looked at art! I took her down to the children's room and she played for awhile. Then we went to the still life room full of objects that kids can arrange to make their own still life. Lavender and her new friend Alison decided to use every possible object they could get their hands on to make "dinner." They had a great time and made quite a mess.

After lunch, Evan went to look at a few more things by himself. About 15 minutes before we were supposed to go pick up our luggage and head to the airport, I got a text from Evan saying the right side of his chest hurt and he couldn't breathe. When we met him, he was obviously in a lot of pain. John got him in a taxi and took him to Northwestern Hospital. After an EKG and a chest x-ray, they diagnosed a partially collapsed lung. It can happen spontaneously, often to tall, thin men. He had surgery to place a tube in his lung and is spending the night in the hospital. Hopefully, we can fly home soon. Meanwhile we are all feeling a little crazy. This was not the way we wanted to extend our trip. Please keep Evan in your prayers!

Firsts and Nots

Today was the first time:

* We visited Frank Lloyd Wright's beautiful prairie style Robie house
* We narrowly missed being caught in a Chicago storm!
* We ate at Noodles Etc
* We visited the Museum of Science and Industry
* Lavender saw chicks hatching
* Lavender "drove" a real tractor
* I took at two year old to a 45 minute film about D-day. (It was excellent and she slept the whole time. Win-win!)
* I took a two year old on a motion simulator ride (She loved it.)
* Evan stood inside a tornado (Twice! Once he even took his little sister.)
* Evan experimented with ferromagnetic fluid.
* I heard of ferromagnetic fluid
* Lavender tried repeatedly to steal a ball from the air pressure exhibit.
* We took a taxi to the magnificent Buckingham fountain where the kids got completely soaked!
* We soaked our tired feet in the creek in Millennium Park
* Evan tried Chicago deep dish pizza
* I have eaten pizza in over a year (they had gluten free, so I decided to try the chicken pesto pizza.

It was not the first time:

* We visited a Frank Lloyd Wright House in Chicago. (Love his work!)
* I realized my kids are smarter than me.
* I was grateful to have Evan along on this trip
* One of my children has tried (or succeeded) to steal something
* I wished we had cool fountains at home (we've got the beach though, and you can't beat that!)
* My feet have gotten tired while site seeing
* We took pictures at the bean AKA Cloud Gate. It is so cool you have to keep going back.
* John and Evan went to the Sears/Willis Tower. The view is worth another trip up to the 103 floor!

Today's Top 10

10. Meeting a T-Rex named Sue at the Field Museum
9. Discovering that Evan's hand is not as big as a gorilla's and that Lavender "DO NOT LIKE that gorilla!"
8. Visiting ancient Egypt and trying to explain mummies and sarcophagi to a 2 year old.
7. Taking a Marianne-style selfie (I have dozens of silly poses of my two girls. Today it was my turn.)
6. Jellyfish and seahorses at the Shedd Aquarium
5. Watching Evan pet stingrays and sturgeon while little sister desperately wanted to and stuck her hands in the water over and over again, but exclaiming, "too scary" every time.
4. A willing, cheap babysitter! (We brought him back Chipotle)
3. Finally finding the sushi place (even though it was closed)
2. Finding a fabulous Asian Fusion restaurant with some of the best sushi John's ever tasted
1. A stroll along the river with my sweetheart.

Bonus: A toddler who slept over 12 hours last night and then took an hour nap in the stroller this afternoon.