Childbirth

Did I scare you with that title?  Don't worry, this post contains no graphic information or photos :)

When I was 16 1/2 years old, my youngest brother David was born and I was there.  I mean right there.  The nurses in the hospital were not happy about my presence and tried to shoo me out of the room, but my Mom insisted and the nurses reluctantly followed the doctor's orders to let me stay.  I stood right by my Mom's shoulder, so I had a good view, but I didn't have to see anything I didn't want to!

Mom made the whole process look very easy.  She was calm and quiet and David emerged after just a few pushes.  He was her fifth and final baby born (as were the first four) after just a few hours of labor without a epidural or any type of pain medication.

This experience shaped my views of childbirth.  I saw firsthand that labor and birth did not have to be the terrible, painful experience I had seen on TV.  Mainly, it eased my fears about birth and becoming a mother.  Certainly, I was very naive in expecting my first baby to come as easily as my mom's fifth.  However, I am grateful for the confidence it gave me in knowing "I can do this someday!"

Seven years later, I was gave birth to my own baby and I followed my mom's example in having a natural birth.  I did quite a bit of research and preparation in making this decision and ultimately, with my husband's approval, I decided it was the right choice for me and my baby.  For me, giving birth naturally has been a very empowering experience.  It has strengthened me in ways that are difficult for me to verbalize or express in writing. 

I believe that choices in childbirth are very personal and I understand and rejoice in the fact that there are so many safe options available for mothers and babies.  Please understand that I am not criticizing or judging anyone who made a different choice or had a different experience than me.

With the birth of each of my children, I have learned different lessons.  So over the next few days I want to share a bit about the birth of each one.  I guess it is one way I am preparing as I approach my fifth and final birth experience. 

PS I promise the upcoming posts will also be free of anything too graphic!

Pregnancy Favorites

This morning I was telling my kids how delicious my breakfast tasted.  They looked at my bowl of oatmeal and thought I was crazy. 
"But it is made with milk, not water and it has FRESH blueberries and bananas!"  I explained.

They nodded, but I could tell they weren't convinced.  Finally Marianne said, "You enjoy your food way too much lately."

I guess she's right, at least some of the time.  Breakfast has never been my favorite meal of the day, but I love eating breakfast at this point in my pregnancy.  It settles my stomach after a long night of popping Tums.  Some of my favorites are:

Fresh fruit, especially blueberries and clementines (but not together)
Peanut butter on toast
Cottage cheese with apples

For lunch my favorites include:
(You guessed it) Cottage cheese with something salty like tortilla chips or triscuits
Quesadillas
Cheese and crackers
(Did you notice a theme here?)

By dinner I really don't feel like eating, but I make myself eat something.  The only thing I can't handle right now is eggplant.  John loves fresh eggplant so I coat it in breadcrumbs/seasonings/parmesan cheese and bake it.  Usually I like it too, but during this pregnancy I have a strange reaction to it.  When I eat it, my mouth feels fuzzy.  If I keep eating it, I feel sick.  It is almost like an allergic reaction.

After Christmas, Evan stocked up on incredibly cheap candy canes.  I wasn't very happy with all that candy, but now I am really grateful.  I love having a candy cane every day.  I think it is the peppermint that helps settle my stomach and prevent heartburn, when the Pepcid doesn't do its job.  Even my peppermint scented body wash makes me feel better during my shower. 

When I was pregnant with my other kids, I didn't really have any cravings and my diet didn't change much.  This time has been weird and I am kind of driving my family crazy.  On the other hand, I have gained only a fraction of the weight I did with my other kids.  My doctor says it's fine because the baby is growing and doing well. Yeah!

December Highlights

Our month started out beautifully on Dec 1st when we found out we are having a baby girl. I blogged about that, but I missed the rest of the month. 
So even though it is nearly the end of January, here are a few of our December highlights.

My baby brother David came from Texas to spend Christmas with us.  My kids thought it was the best part of Christmas.

 

Marianne received her patriarchal blessing.  It was a very sweet and comforting blessing.

Evan was called as Deacon's quorum president.

John was released as YM president and was called as a Webelos leader

We traveled to Utah for my grandma's 90th birthday party!

We went with my brother Scott's family to see the lights in Salt Lake
at temple square in 58 degree weather.  Yes!

Marianne took lots of pictures!

We stayed with John's sister Susan and had a great time with her family. 

John with his sisters Susan and Jean

Evan with his cousin Josh

The whole family spent New Year's Eve partying at a comedy club.  Only on Utah can you find clean, family-friendly standup comedy.

Evan onstage at Comedy Sports Utah

We had a great month!

A gift from Mom

I recently received a special gift from my Mom.  The day before her birthday I was cleaning out my dad's desk.  In between some papers, I found a letter my mom wrote to me 15 years ago, but never gave to me. She had printed it out and then made a few changes by hand, so I think it was unfinished.  Here are a few quotes from the letter.


"As a parent I do not believe there are favorite children.  I believe there are favorite things about each child."


"As I watch you parent your children, I am pleased with the respect you show for them and the dignity with which you parent.  As they grow older you will come to realize that even though you are the Mother now, we are truly all brothers and sisters, and then you will find as I have that your respect for your children as individuals grows even stronger."

"My testimony of Jesus Christ is strong!  There is no doubt that He lives!  Joseph Smith did indeed translate the Book of Mormon from Gold plates and did restore Christ's church upon the earth.  Never doubt that there is eternal life and that the covenants that we make in the temple are God's plan.  Always remain true to this gospel and know that God hears and answers our prayers and that everything we experience in this life is for our own growth and benefit.  I love you #1 daughter!"

"You have always known that I love you.  I write this letter now to confirm and put that love (a feeble attempt I might add) on paper, that you may have this to read when I am not around."

A (very soft) Happy Birthday to you!

Last week was my mom's 70th birthday, so we decided to have a little celebration.  First we headed to the cemetery.  We put new flowers mom's grave and decorated the trees with glittery hearts.  We also sang "Happy Birthday" although we decided to sing quietly since there was a graveside service in progress just down the hill.

The hearts were Cammi's idea.  Perfect since we can keep them up through February.

Papa John and Brianne

Colorful flowers for Mom

Leighton had fun blowing bubbles.

Back at home we ate dinner, had cake and ice cream and sang "Happy Birthday" a little more loudly.  We also broke open a box of See's Candy.  Evan had been trying to convince me all day that "Grandma would let me open the candy . . .Grandma wouldn't have made me wait."  Then we played a rousing game of  Scattergories and found out how competitive our family really is!

Happy Birthday Mom!

Change

Just over 3 years ago, my life was pretty predictable.  My house was filled with my husband, 4 kids and a dog.  I knew that things would change in the future, but I figured change would happen gradually and I would have plenty of time to adjust.

Here are the not-so-gradual changes that have happened since then:
(Not in chronological order, and most have been in the past 2 years!)

2 sons leave home for college
2 sons leave on missions
1 wedding and a new daughter-in-law joins our family
My husband's stepmother passes away
My husband's family home is cleaned and sold--all belongings sold/donated/divided
2 beautiful granddaughters are born
My mom becomes ill and passes away
I am pregnant at age 44
1 more wedding when my dad remarries
My parent's home is being reorganized with Mom's belongings divided and donated

If someone would have told me what my life would look like by the end of 2011, I wouldn't have believed it.  I am happy with my life and many of the changes are wonderful blessings, but I am still shocked with how much my life has changed in the past couple of years.

I have a feeling 2012 will be another year of change.  I guess I'd better get used to it!

I did it again

I should be at Stake Conference right now, but I am blogging instead.  Why?  My husband tells me I "overdid it again."  Actually, he's told me this several times recently.  It turns out that you have to take it easier when you are pregnant.  At least pregnant grandmas need to rest more than non-pregnant grandmas.  Or maybe it is just me! 

I have cut back in several areas of my life.  I don't have a calling (except for visiting teaching) right now.  I am not mentoring at our commonwealth school this year.  I am not cooking dinner every night.  Okay, most nights.  I haven't been walking regularly.  And you may not have noticed, but I haven't been blogging.  However, I do have a few projects that need to be completed before the baby comes.

#1 We are re-doing our bedroom so that we have a place for the baby.  This is also a perfect excuse to get rid of the broken, 20+ year old, ugly furniture!  John and Evan have done most of the work, but I guess sitting in my recliner while supervising makes me tired.

#2  I am helping to clean out my dad's house so he can prepare to rent it.  Again, I am not doing hard physical labor there. We just cleaned out my mom's sewing room.  I told John that all I did yesterday was sit in a chair and boss Jenny around.  He said he believes the bossing part, but not the sitting in a chair part. 

Every inch of this closet was filled with fabric and quilting supplies before we got to it!

 

#3  Baby registries!  Laugh if you will, but this is hard work!  I'm not sure they even had baby registries when my other kids were born.  Talk about pressure.  What if I choose the wrong carseat or stroller?!  This stuff is expensive and I want to get it right.  Once again, I did most of my copious research and registering online from the comfort of my couch.  But you've got to see some of this stuff in person and walking around Babies R Us for several hours with a scanner can wear a pregnant grandma out.  (Thank goodness Molly and the 2 adorable grandbabies accompanied me on this trip.   Molly was very helpful, plus it was fun to watch the employees trying to figure out our relationships.  I didn't say a word and just let them wonder!)

Now you have my excuse for missing church today.  I should probably go lie down now.  This blogging is hard work!

He's There!

Since Monday I've been relying on the philosophy of "no news is good news."  Thankfully we now have some actual good news!  We got an email from Elder Aaron's mission president.  He arrived and is doing well and will be serving in the North York area of Toronto.  He has two companions right now.  His trainer is Elder Lee and his other companion is none other than Elder Snarr who has been his MTC companion for the last 12 weeks.

We can't wait until next week when we'll get an email from Aaron himself.  We are happy to have a few pictures to tide us over until then.

With President & Sister Scott

With his "new" companions

And He's Off!

Today was a big day that started very early!  Elder Aaron got up at 2:45 AM to prepare for his departure to Toronto.  They left the Missionary Training Center around 4:00 AM and at 5:15 we got a phone call from a pay phone at the SLC airport.  Elder Aaron had just a few minutes before boarding his flight, but it was wonderful to hear his voice.  It has been three months since we've spoken to him.  He sounded good and seemed to have everything under control, although he did confess that he has lost about 10 pounds while at the MTC.  (I'm sure he didn't mention it earlier because he didn't want me to worry . . . or nag him . . . or send huge care packages full of food.)  Many missionaries gain weight while at the MTC due to the many hours spent sitting and studying.  Oh and the desserts every night might have something to do with it too!  Elder Aaron explained that after a year of cafeteria food at BYU plus 3 more months of it at the MTC, he just can't take it any more.  He is looking forward to cooking for himself and learning how to make some Korean dishes while he is in Toronto.  Hopefully he will gain back the weight he lost because that boy doesn't have any extra pounds to lose!

Elder Aaron should be in Toronto by now. We know that many wonderful experiences await him!  Now I have to brag about my missionary a little.  I promise it won't be like this post.

A few weeks ago I got a Christmas card from a family friend.  She received our Christmas newsletter and was excited to see that Elder Aaron was in the Korean branch at the MTC.  She and her husband serve in the Mandarin branch there.  She immediately talked to the Korean branch president's wife and gave me the report that Elder Aaron is  "kind, humble and good at the Korean language."  That's my boy!

On Christmas Day with one of the Korean Elders

Sweet Sunday

One December night I went to bed feeling lonely and kind of sorry for myself.  When I awoke, my mind was filled with some of my blessings.  God told me that he had given me true friends.  These are not the kind of friends who go shopping and out to lunch and then wave goodbye.  Rather, these are friends and family members who have loved me enough to help me teach and raise my children.  Some of these women have selflessly spent hundreds, perhaps even thousands of hours loving and teaching my children at church, seminary, homeschool classes and in their homes..

I am grateful for these women and their influence on our family.  This quote by Spencer W. Kimball describes them well.

To be a righteous woman during the winding up scenes on this earth, before the second coming of our Savior, is an especially noble calling. The righteous woman’s strength and influence today can be tenfold what it might be in more tranquil times. She has been placed here to help to enrich, to protect, and to guard the home – which is society’s basic and most noble institution. Other institutions in society may falter and even fail, but the righteous woman can help to save the home, which may be the last and only sanctuary some mortals know in the midst of storm and strife. . .


Selflessness is a key to happiness and effectiveness; it is precious and must be preserved as a virtue which guarantees so many other virtues. There are so many things in the world which reinforce our natural selfishness, and neither our men nor women should be partakers thereof. We have grown strong as a people because our mothers and our women have been so selfless. That ennobling quality must not be lost, even though some of the people of the world may try to persuade otherwise.

If you are wondering if you are one of these women, the answer is yes. You are!

Missing in Action

I am sad to see that I only posted 3 times in December.  I had a good December and a wonderful Christmas, but something had to give and it was blogging.  Growing a baby seems to take up most of my energy these days.  So here is a poem in honor of the sweet girl who is my excuse for not blogging much in the past month.

This poem was published in the Ensign in 1999 when Evan was a year old.  I  immediately loved this beautiful poem about motherhood.  It resonated with me and I kept it in my nightstand for all these years.  A few months ago, I pulled it out and realized that although this will only be my 5th child, it is my 7th pregnancy.  I have miscarried two babies, one at 13+ weeks and one at 8 weeks.

So here this lovely poem for my 7th baby.  She will be here in two months.

Seventh Child

By Sharon Price Anderson

Sarah would laugh

to think that I feel old,

yet understand better than I

the longing which gives you life

and overcomes the logic

that it has been too long

and six is sufficient

for seed as dust and stars.

Is it your desire

to come to earth

that makes me willing

to give you birth

and further fulfill God’s promise?

What blessing will you bring?

What mission will be yours

in this Saturday of time,

you who are Sarah’s increase

as well as mine?

Could I have kept completely

my mortal purpose and

consecration’s covenant

without you?

Sarah knew much of

altars aging,

offspring waiting,

missions and promises.

Now as we grow and wait,

she would teach us also faith.