Holes

When I experience loss and sadness I feel like there is a hole in me. It seems like a part of me is missing. For most of my life, I have suffered with very few of these holes. The ones in my past have healed and there is no sign that there was ever anything lacking.

But lately, I feel like a piece of swiss cheese. A few holes opened up over the past couple of years. Then the loss of my mom last month left a huge gaping hole. Today, I was released from my calling as Primary president--another hole! I have never been so sad to be released from any calling. I think it is because of the joy I feel when I am around the children. I love teaching children, so doing sharing time in Primary is one of my favorite things!

This year my youngest son turned twelve. I love seeing him grow and progress, but I have felt the loss of my own children. I miss having young children in my home and I think that being with the Primary children each week helped ease that loss. I am going to miss them terribly. I think the pain is more acute because I so recently suffered the loss of my mom.

I will also miss the closeness I felt with the great women in our presidency. I have been in numerous presidencies and I have enjoyed all of them, but this one was especially sweet.

I know that the Savior will heal these holes and give me peace and comfort, but I need to be patient and focus on prayer and gratitude. This scripture says it all!

Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God. And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus. Phillipians 4:6-7